For Women

In a society where many women put on a convincing front, portraying themselves as genuinely confident, by waking up extra early to put on a full costume, it’s hard for other women to relate and see themselves in her.

I challenge you to be the majority.

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The majority of women who speak life into others and who comfort others in their struggles affirming that they are not alone. Life’s obstacles are rough and tougher to overcome alone.

The most common obstacle women share is low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem causes some women to compete with each other for attention, confirmation of their superiority, or confirmation that what they are doing matters more than who they are.

There is no definitive answer for where low self-esteem comes from because it is a combination of things that make women feel ugly. Those things range from the depiction of a woman in the media, how the woman was raised, where the woman is from, what struggle the woman has endured, who the woman had to face and conquer etc. When you combine all of those things with living paycheck to paycheck to pay off debts, paying bills, missed opportunities and the lack of emotional support you will see that women are worn out.

The last thing the next woman needs is to be knocked down by another, no matter how confident she may appear.

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Women are tired. Tired of acting. Tired of trying. Tired of working. Tired of supporting those without reciprocity. Tired of posting the edited versions of flawless photos. Tired of competing with our male-counterparts who do less work but make two to three thousand more a month. Tired of eating lettuce and meal prepping when donuts taste better. Tired from staying up all night and getting up early. Tired of doing the dishes. Tired of washing the clothes.

Tired of wearing the costume.

One thing women won’t do though, is give up. Just as it is, every woman should face each day with new strength knowing that they will overcome. Some women cannot do so when they can only carry-over what they have faced the previous day. Do not make this harder for the next by projecting yourself and your negative views to antagonize that woman to fit your narrative.

Make room for every woman to feel comfortable being herself, doing her own thing and communicating how she feels in a conducive manner. In that the next woman will see that she is no different from the rest. In that, you will see that she is no different from you.

Should it really take a heart to heart and tearful conversation for all women to see that the majority of us are just alike? No.

If you quit fronting and save the costumes for Halloween you’ll be able to see the world clearly. You’ll be able to look around and recognize other women for who they are and not who you need them to be to make you feel better about yourself. You will see that they struggle with the same things you are struggling with.

You will also see in them, the same determination in you.

They will be your reminder of the woman’s collective inability to give up. A reminder that women are the light and dark to this world.

For most, I want to you that you can do anything that you set out to do and work hard for, I want to yell out, “You got this sis!” but then I don’t. I sit back and I say my prayer, then I go write about the strength of these women and find through my words that I am also inspiring myself.

So as my words inspire me, I hope that they inspire you in return. The struggle that you may be facing is not the extent of your existence but a mere stumble in the road on your path to fulfilling God’s destined plan for you. It is not our struggles that hinder our growth, it is our struggles that enable our growth.

Retire the costume and say a prayer for your true self. Say a prayer for the next woman to embrace her true self.

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A prayer for my sisters:

I pray that you continuously work hard to get where you want to be in life. I pray that no obstacle is ever tough enough to hold you back. I pray that no matter how tired you are that you will always get the job done. I pray that you always find the inner strength. I pray that the well wishes you speak for the women around you, the women you do not know or the women who have touched your life in some way, also reach you.

–      Star Candelaria

My First Love

Sacrificed on the cross to pay for my sins,

dead for thousands of years but living within.

Teaching me how to forgive without receiving apology

and how to release every, one and thing not made for me.

How to appreciate those who show that they care,

how to be omnipresent although not physically there.

Oh, Christ has always been my first love.

Guiding me each step, side by side. From above.

Domesticated Abuse

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

A flash of his smile had me going insane

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Held in his arms, I’d finally been claimed.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

My heart in my chest, I tried to maintain.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Professing his love in poems.. and he was lame.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Passionate about the issues, the fire to my flame.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Then one day he asked me to take his last name.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

The white dress and attention similar to fame.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

But behind closed doors. It was all just a game.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Degrading words flew out like bats from a cave.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

The tears fell faster when he forced it in my brain.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Crying in my hand I remembered Rec1aim.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Blood on my clothes I tried to remove the stains.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

My heart beat fast when I broke from the chains.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

It was a new year but it had ended the same.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

His grip was so strong and there I remained.

Red roses, back rubs and champagne,

Right by his side when I blew out my brains.Screen Shot 2016-10-20 at 12.15.20 AM.pngScreen Shot 2016-10-20 at 12.16.54 AM.png

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